You can't fake chemistry.
Even if you really, really want to. If you are waiting for someone to grow on you, that's a sure sign that there is chemistry missing. If, hypothetically, your first kiss with someone you've gone on 5 dates with turns into a 2 hour make-out session with partial nudity (hypothetically!), and even though you're enjoying yourself, you still don't feel that spark ("you" being someone else entirely. Not me. Definitely not me.), that's a bad sign.
I would give that person the following advice: Stop the relationship before it goes even further.
But then they'd say, "but he's nice, handsome, sweet, intelligent".
And I'd reply, "So? If you aren't feeling that spark, find it with someone else who is nice, handsome, sweet, and intelligent."
"But!"
"No buts! You're looking for a connection young lady. Not someone who's nice enough to hang out with. If you're forcing yourself to feel something it means you aren't feeling anything. Piss or get off the pot."
"But I don't want to hurt him."
"Oh please! You aren't in a committed relationship. Stop it before you'd feel even worse if you 'broke up'. You've met a nice guy who can now be a nice friend you happen to have seen naked. End of story."
Damn it, I hate when I'm right.
Even if you really, really want to. If you are waiting for someone to grow on you, that's a sure sign that there is chemistry missing. If, hypothetically, your first kiss with someone you've gone on 5 dates with turns into a 2 hour make-out session with partial nudity (hypothetically!), and even though you're enjoying yourself, you still don't feel that spark ("you" being someone else entirely. Not me. Definitely not me.), that's a bad sign.
I would give that person the following advice: Stop the relationship before it goes even further.
But then they'd say, "but he's nice, handsome, sweet, intelligent".
And I'd reply, "So? If you aren't feeling that spark, find it with someone else who is nice, handsome, sweet, and intelligent."
"But!"
"No buts! You're looking for a connection young lady. Not someone who's nice enough to hang out with. If you're forcing yourself to feel something it means you aren't feeling anything. Piss or get off the pot."
"But I don't want to hurt him."
"Oh please! You aren't in a committed relationship. Stop it before you'd feel even worse if you 'broke up'. You've met a nice guy who can now be a nice friend you happen to have seen naked. End of story."
Damn it, I hate when I'm right.
Comments
- js (and I'm sure I speak for at least the majority of your adoring public)