Thursday, November 03, 2005

Fiiiive Golden Riiings

What’s rule number one when you are a single girl? Look for a ring. Rule number 2? Double check for a ring! Rule number 3? Ditto.

Why is there no school or seminar for newly single people to learn these rules? Actually I’m sure there is such a seminar but I didn’t look for one. It should be automatic. Like AARP sending you their information as soon as you turn 50. (Aside: I don’t know why they keep sending ME their information. Someone needs to update their database.)

Anyway, I have not yet absorbed the cardinal rule of looking for a ring. This became abundantly clear when nice med student finally replied and very nicely (did I mention he was nice?) told me that he got my message but he’d been very busy and he hopes he’ll be less busy next semester when his wife arrives. DOH!

He was very considerate of my feelings and added the following:

“I was not sure if you noticed my ring or not (it was not just a pirate ring after all). I just got married this last summer. I am sorry it did not come up or was not clear at the party. If you would still want to grab a tea or coffee sometime, it might be nice for us all to have coffee, as I am always looking to try to find ways to help my wife meet awesome folks (like yourself) in this new part of the country. I of course totally understand if you do not want to have coffee/tea with us either.”

See? What did I tell you? Nice! No wonder he’s taken.

After being horrifyingly embarrassed I sent the following response.

“Dear Nice Med Student,
I totally did not catch the ring! The reason being I'm only just recently single (recently as in only a few weeks) after being married for 7.5 years and have not quite gotten the hang of it yet. At all. I didn't even look. The last time I was "on the market" I was 18 and rings weren't an issue. I feel like a little bit of an idiot but it is a very good lesson to learn. I'm glad I suffered this social faux pas with someone as nice and honest as you.

Let's start over shall we? Hi, I'm ----. It's nice to meet you and your wife. And once I get over my mild embarrassment I'd be happy to invite both of you into my social circle (for what it's worth) of professional people in their late 20's and early 30's in the area. I love expanding my network of friends - it'll help increase my potential to meet people who are ACTUALLY single. Be sure to point them out won't you?

Good luck with all your exams! I have many friends who have gone through med school and I know it is insane. If you are as busy as you say you are your wife will definitely need some people to hang out with. I'd be happy to be one of them.”
I thought that was self-effacing and honest enough. And true. I’d be happy to have them as friends. It makes for a funny single girl story. Embarrassing as hell, but funny.

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