I found a post at Some Girl through my friend Jennifer talking about said Jennifer's limerence. I had never heard that term before. The best definition I could find (besides as described by Some Girl) is the "emotional excitement of being in love". I think the slang term would be Smitten. Glowing. Head over heels. Over the moon. Etc. Etc. Etc.
It's comforting on some level to know that the reason you are acting all crazy has been defined. Granted there are several psychological issues that have been defined that I would not like to find myself acting out. Psychopathic being one of them. Delusional being another.
Bruce Lee said "Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable."*
I like this analogy. (Have I mentioned I like analogies? I believe I have. I really like analogies.) Limerence, then, is that early flame. The energy that makes you stop eating (Although not in my case. Very little gets me to stop eating. Including stomach bugs. But I digress...) and want to spend every waking moment with the other person. Because being part of that flame is addictive. This is a dangerous time in a relationship I think. For one, you can cut yourself off from others you know. Which I think is perfectly ok for a time. Embrace your happiness. We don't get to burn brightly very often.
Another danger is that this is the time when the flame can flicker and go out unless there is more fuel behind it, or it is stoked somehow. Something has to be underneath in order for the coals to catch and continue. Lighter fluid only makes the flame flare up. It doesn't necessarily keep it burning. If you, or the other person, aren't ready to tend that fire it will go out.
I'm happy by my fire. I'm poking at it with a stick now and then, hoping to keep it lit and not accidentally put it out. Luckily, I'm fairly certain someone is on the other side poking back.
Burn baby burn. But slowly.
* I totally stole this quote out of the mouth of Chris Stevens, KBHR radio host, Northern Exposure.
It's comforting on some level to know that the reason you are acting all crazy has been defined. Granted there are several psychological issues that have been defined that I would not like to find myself acting out. Psychopathic being one of them. Delusional being another.
Bruce Lee said "Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable."*
I like this analogy. (Have I mentioned I like analogies? I believe I have. I really like analogies.) Limerence, then, is that early flame. The energy that makes you stop eating (Although not in my case. Very little gets me to stop eating. Including stomach bugs. But I digress...) and want to spend every waking moment with the other person. Because being part of that flame is addictive. This is a dangerous time in a relationship I think. For one, you can cut yourself off from others you know. Which I think is perfectly ok for a time. Embrace your happiness. We don't get to burn brightly very often.
Another danger is that this is the time when the flame can flicker and go out unless there is more fuel behind it, or it is stoked somehow. Something has to be underneath in order for the coals to catch and continue. Lighter fluid only makes the flame flare up. It doesn't necessarily keep it burning. If you, or the other person, aren't ready to tend that fire it will go out.
I'm happy by my fire. I'm poking at it with a stick now and then, hoping to keep it lit and not accidentally put it out. Luckily, I'm fairly certain someone is on the other side poking back.
Burn baby burn. But slowly.
* I totally stole this quote out of the mouth of Chris Stevens, KBHR radio host, Northern Exposure.
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